Basic Web Design with Jamie King

Intro Class - Friday, April 18th 6:00 - 7:30 P.M

Cost: $160.00

This eighteen week course will focus on teaching you the beginnings of web design and help you achieve a finished project at the end of the classes without frying your brain. Starting with basic HTML mastery for the first eight weeks, you will learn basic code structure, concepts, tools and theories that will help you grasp and retain knowledge so you can finally build that website that you know you've always wanted. The second eight weeks will give you basic graphic design skills so you can create a custom layout for whatever project it is you're working on.

The majority of this course is contained in easy to use online lessons, which will allow you the ease of working from (or banging on) your own computer from home. A computer with internet capabilities is highly suggested.

For more information or register, please contact Jamie at 503-463-4020 or E-mail Me@kiddlets.com

You know you want to! :)


In honor of CS coming out and the fact that I don't have to buy it because someone got it for me, I am now the keeper of Ashers' Lighter.

I'd also like to add that I'm the first. Therefor the REAL keeper of his lighter. Woo baby, woo. How is that for spiffy?

I'm such a geek.

Pran? If you're still online, get on AIM!
The riviting and never ending soap that is my odd daily life continues with an all new episode. This week, we find CCD pulling a typical bureaucratic move on LKP when they find to their horror, that the Shahish iron fist world they illusion themselves with does not apply to my business. They can't touch us. They can't rule us. They can't harrass us. They don't even know how to catagorize us. The only thing they can do to us is slap us upside the head with those little clipboards they hide behind, and boy, does that freak them out.

With a slightly befuddled and perturbed tone, they leave a message on my business line: "You might have to be licensed with us. Call us, and we'll talk about your options."

How about no?

Now, the professional side of me will call them, and will explain to them, in my very nice professional Jamie voice "there are no guidelines set forth by any goverment or private entity in the state of Oregon or in the United States that can govern, oversee, (or bully for that matter) my company. And although I find this a shame, because there are no benchmarks that can help form a good quality program, it also means that I don't have to be licensed by you."

In my head, however, it will be a totally different story, in my best screeching immature six year old voice, I'll be sticking out my tongue while pulling on my ears.

"I know the OSR back and forth, I can recite it backwards standing on my head in six feet of quicksand with rabid sloths eating my toes, and guess what? You can touch me, nanny nanny boo boo! What's that? Nope, I'm not liiiiistening. La la la la la la la. I don't have to talk to you and you can't come here an-ny-more! That just chaps your ass, dosen't it? Isn't Karama a bitch? Aw, don't cry. You'll find someone else to terrorize I'm sure. You have a nice day, now!"


I've had alot of questions why I haven't posted. There are alot of reasons. Personal things going on (most personal stuff does not go here, insted it goes in my journal at home. Personal stuff dosen't go here because small-brained people get upset when I talk about situations that are going on. Because some people can't respect my views as mine (and feel I have to be 'nice' all the time and not have any negitive views) and like to try and withold me of my opinion claiming rude things and take offense or cause problems. So it's easier to keep my private thoughts private. Plus, my life is boring.), and because I haven't had anything to say, and like I've said in the past, I write for me, not for people who view this blog. I appriciate that people come here and read this, but I don't, and never have, written for or to draw an audience.

So if there is nothing here, it means I've got nothing to say. People can be angry at me for that, but that's too bad, they can go make their own blog, and post to it if they want content.

Please don't bug me about this anymore, when I post is when I post and asking me won't make it any sooner.
Happy Birthday to Sean :)
I'm going to write them an E-mail, and ask them to call it "Just Crack".

Crammed full 3 oz plastic containers protect this delicate stuff from falling all over the dirty ground. It's sweet, it's tangy, it's crunchy and it's got the weirdest texture ever. It's sort of like when you ate that freeze dried astronaut ice cream during your sixth grade solar system unit.

It's "Just Fruit" and I'm in love.

Just one of the products made by "Just Tomatos, Ect", Just Fruit Munchies are a mix of freeze dried apples, rasins, blueberries, sour cherries, mango, pineapples and blueberries and they're a better buzz then that Meth addiction you shook last year.

Today, after being too broke to feed my habbit, I bought a container of it and saddingly I've almost consumed the whole thing. Not sad because I'm a bloody pig and should be forced to eat only 1974 Weight Watcher food and sweat on a tredmill, but sad because it's almost all gone.

It's good. Go try it yourself, you'll become a mindless addict too. But before you try it, and become so overwhelmed with greed that you'd rather prick out my eyeballs with a gleefully sharpened carrot from the produce department then share, buy me some more too.


Thanks to Kelly, for reaffirming my opinion that the American goverment is run by morons.

That was for you Kel, it's pronounced 'baw' and it means foolish. ;)


I have an unhealthy obsession with "Brown".

Although it may sound this way, this isn't a plea for a free one way ticket to a snazzy drug rehab program where I can hob with the stars. Nor do I like to dress up in frocks that resemble tree bark from around the world.

I'm talkin' about the UPS man, man.

Not the men themselves (although the disgusting seriously girly side of me enjoys that added bonus of cute guys in pants. Not in short shorts, there is something very wrong about a guy in short shorts.). It's not even the big roaring trucks (Machines just don't do it for me, unless they can render three seperate 3D models in under five minutes and run six other programs in the background.), it's the stuff.

Oh lord, my kingdom for a box.

The Gods are tempting me. Once again they're using me for their odd amusment. Over the past month I have seen not one, not two, but six unattended UPS (or Fed Ex, I don't discriminate) trucks. Left all alone on a corner or in a parking lot, side of the truck gaping open where the door should be, calling me to come inside and rip it off.

I'm sort of like a oversexed guy who's been locked in a dark closet with nothing but his hand for ten years and gets rescued by like minded nymphos fresh from the local gymnasium. Boxes. They butter my muffin. Crisp my cracker. Chew my gumball. Yeah, you get the point.

It's so very upsetting too, when the nasty cricket in my head kicks in and sings me out of causing a high speed police chase while littering the freeway with packing material.


As James so nicely pointed out, blogspot seems to have two ads at the top of it now. Hopefully that's an error somewhere, and not something new and fixed.


Spent my few free hours the last couple of days working on a blog layout. No, it wasn't mine. It was Prana's, I haven't had time to finish my new one yet. Kins mentioned that she wanted one, so as soon as I can pin her down I'll see what she wants. (Knowing my luck, something involving naked people doing naughty naked things.) Everybody gets one freebie (just as long as it's not involving a dumpster or a seedy hotel room) and then you've got to pay me. I'm cheap, but I'm not that cheap.

LKP now has it's first offical School Picture Day coming up. Fun for the kids, bad for the Jamie. I've been secretly creating a intricate paper bag mask to wear when they do the class picture. I'm trying to figure out a good story to convince everyone that I really was born wearing a paper bag, and since I've had it on my entire life, removing it would prove to be fatal for me. In fact, I don't even have a face anymore because the rough reycled paper has over the years molded to my head and become my face. I'm really Paper Bag Woman, Jamie is just my secret identity. With these fake no-lens glasses, I fooled them all.

Back me up on this, would you?


I slashed and hacked about 16 classes and workshops (well, cut 9, moved the rest to Summer Term) from March and about 10 from April. This is so very nice. It means I can have Thursdays off again. At least for now anyway.


What's so damn hard about just being honest with me?


I just had a totally long (but fun) workshop. This workshop was the only non-PDR workshop I have schedualed for the next three months (that I know of). Today, yours truly made a great big mess like the great big dorky kid I am, because today, I made soap. Soap soap soap! Whee!

Yep, I spent the last five hours with ten other people crammed in the kitchen of the H.O.M.E center, being dizzy from the essental oil fumes, making hand crafted hot-cast soap.

It was so kewl.

I've always wanted to make soap, but because of time and not really knowing how to go about it, I never did. April (the lady who ran the workshop) has her own soap making company, so it was really neat to see how quickly she could churn out ten pounds of soap without burning her hands down to the bone.

We made coconut oil lavender soap (with dried lavender and lavender oil in it, smells great, annoys the holy hell out of my hands..lol), and since it was the hot process we had to use lye (all soap is made using lye, that's how glycerine is made, so don't let anyone tell you any different. That dosen't mean all soap has lye in it. I'm going to ask her to do a cold soap class, because I'd like to be able to do soap with crap embedded in it) and lucky me, my hands are evil, and plot ways to pain me.

Since you're not supposed to touch the soap with bare skin for four weeks until the lye is completely gone, everything is done with rubber gloves or through a mold. My hands are so wicked that even through the soap mold (a tupperware container..lol) they got irritated. I've had to wash them in vinagar and they're still stinging. That's another reason I've stayed away from making soap (and candles too), my hands get so easily upset that it just makes it frustrating.

It has to cure for four weeks, so it can't be used until then (I can cut it tonight though) but I have enough for probably six small bars of soap. I can't use it because of my hands (it's too strong), but I am willing to pimp my love-a-lee smelling soap off on anyone who wants a bar (For the low, easy one time payment of nothing! That's right! Absolutely zilch, zip and nada. And if you act now, we'll throw in this free manila envelope!) when touching them won't give you a fun trip to the burn ward.