I sort of feel like things are moving to split the YCC (an activity program I run) up or take the youth program out of my hands again. This frustrates me a little because I've spent the last few years - the last especially - building the program in a way that makes the kids come back, and enjoy themselves and feel like they're part of the center, not just being babysat, which I think is the most important.

Nobody's really said anything. I've been asked a couple questions about my childbase ages, and also been told a couple people have expressed interest in dealing with older children (but nobody has come to talk to me, at all, they all go over my head, even though I do the youth program.) and that's been about it, but that's how it starts.

I've had the program taken from me in the past, and every time not only did it fail miserably (and let me tell you, it failed, not once, not twice, but four times, and each time I was the one called back in to fix it and take back over), but it also cause all the kids I had coming to quit, and took me nearly six months (after it had been given back to me, because the people who took it quit after a couple months) and major overhaul of the program to have them start coming on a regular basis again.

If they do decide to split up stuff, I have suggestions. Do you think anyone wants them? Of course not, what will happen is I'll lose all the older kids (90% of my classbase) and will have the younger children (I have six kids under 9, and only one comes regularly, and regularly for her is maybe three times a month)or will be asked to become an 'assistant' to whoever takes it over, which royally peeves me off. I run this thing, if anyone should have assistants it should be me.

So they'll take it, then they'll blow it, and nobody'll come anymore or the person who's taking it over will quit (because it's a big commitment, not just showing up and playing, there is work, like planning classes, and learning the children's names) and I'll have to rebuild the whole thing again.

What frustrates me, is I want to set up programs for infants and preschoolers and teenagers, but not enough kids come right now to merit it, plus the kids like being all in one group so I don't want to take that away from them.

Besides, if they want to set up groups, I think it would be fair to give me first pick of which class I want. Not just give it to someone who walks up and goes 'oh by the way, I want the older kids' and take it away from me and give it to them. After years? What kind of thanks is that? Is that really how important I am to their program? I'm not saying I won't share, or that I won't gladly work with other people to set up other classes. I just don't think I should have it jerked away from me with an 'oh by the way'. Plus, it cheeses me that none of these people who have 'expressed interest' in the older kids have ONCE offered to volunteer in the classes to see how it goes.

I would think before you even considered them to work with kids you'd have them come work with me and meet the kids. I can't even get people to commit to driving for field trips until the last minute, and they think these people will show up every class and follow through?

In all these years, I've only missed two classes. I know all the kids, their birthdays, their phone numbers, what schools they go to, their favorite color, their favorite movies, heck, I know half of their crushes. I could blackmail them, if I wanted to. We're buds, these kids and I, and it's been damn hard getting them to feel like they're really part of the Center and to get them to come every class. It just frustrates me that I've put all this time into it, and I'm just being seen as a stand in until they can get a real teacher, even though I'm the one who built the whole program.

If they do this to me again, I will cry, and then I will quit.